Mental Health Without the Bullsht – Entry #7

IMPORTANT NOTE: I am NOT a mental health professional. If you need help, I STRONGLY encourage you to seek it, and you can start here. This series of blog posts is me candidly sharing my deeply personal experiences with you (with some tears along the way).

We Love a Clean Story

Rock bottom. Breakthrough. Recovery. Redemption. Done.

It’s neat. It’s satisfying.
And it’s complete bullshit.

Real healing doesn’t follow a script.
It’s not a straight line.
It’s a goddamn rollercoaster.

What Healing Looks Like

Healing Looks Like This:

• Two good weeks. Then three days where you can’t get out of bed.
• Making progress in therapy… then getting triggered by something stupid and spiraling again.
• Cutting a toxic habit, person, or behavior—only to invite it back when you’re lonely, tired, or pissed off.
• Feeling proud one minute… and ashamed the next.

It’s not failure.
It’s not weakness.
It’s healing.

Setbacks Aren’t the End

Too many people give up when they slip up.

“I thought I was past this.”
“I’m back at square one.”
“What the hell is wrong with me?”

Let me be clear:
Relapse doesn’t erase recovery.
A bad day doesn’t erase your growth.
A backward step doesn’t mean you’re not still moving forward.

You’re not back where you started. You’re just being reminded that this is hard.

Because it is.

Beating Yourself Up Is Not a Healing Strategy

We think shame will motivate us.
We think we’ll “tough love” ourselves back on track.
But here’s the truth:

You can’t hate yourself into healing.

You can’t grow while you’re berating yourself.
You can’t move forward while dragging your past like a body bag.
You don’t need more self-discipline—you need more self-compassion.

Yeah, I know that word sounds soft.
But try it. See what happens when you start treating yourself like someone you give a damn about.

What Helped Me When I Fell Off the Wagon

Because trust me, I’ve been there.

I’ve relapsed.
I’ve backslid.
I’ve sabotaged my own progress more times than I can count.

Here’s what helped:

• Owning the setback without turning it into a full-blown shame spiral
• Reaching out before the self-hate dug in too deep
• Tracking patterns, not just outcomes
• Talking to myself like I would talk to someone I love
• Remembering this isn’t a race, it’s a life
• Refusing to let one bad chapter define the whole story

Progress is still progress, even if it looks like a jagged, chaotic mess.

Let Yourself Heal Like a Human

Not like a machine.
Not like a motivational quote.
Not like some perfect version of yourself you keep chasing.

Real healing is two steps forward, one step back.
Sometimes it’s five steps back and lying on the damn floor for a while.

And that’s OK.

You’re not failing—you’re living.
And every time you get back up, you prove that healing is still happening.

Final Word

Be patient. Be messy. Be kind.
Your healing won’t look like anyone else’s—and it sure as hell won’t be perfect.

But it’s still yours.
Still real.
Still worth fighting for.