Authenticity is a big deal, and I’ve been thinking a lot about it lately–what it means to be unapologetically, unflinchingly yourself in a world that loves its filters and façades. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my 30+ years of saying what I mean in this industry (and sometimes meaning what I probably shouldn’t have said), it’s this: being real is disarming. It throws people off. Authenticity, done right, can be the sharpest tool in your shed—and the one weapon that doesn’t need sharpening.

Critics and Authenticity

I’ve had my fair share of critics over the years. You don’t spend decades in a field like information security, pointing out uncomfortable truths and calling out bullshit, without ruffling a few feathers. People come at you. Hard.

But here’s what I’ve noticed: when you meet an attack with raw honesty—no spin, no pretense—it takes the wind out of their sails.

Most attacks rely on leverage. They bank on the idea that you’re hiding something or pretending to be someone you’re not. It’s easy to attack a façade—poke at the cracks, expose the gaps. But when you show up exactly as you are, flaws and all, there’s nothing for them to dig into. No hidden weakness, no façade to crumble. You take their leverage and snap it over your knee.

Owning Your Flaws

Here’s an example. I’ve been called blunt (true), rude (sometimes true), or even arrogant (depends on the day). When someone throws those words my way, my response is usually:

“Yep, I can see how you’d think that. I’m a work in progress.”

What can they say to that? Argue with me about my own imperfections? I’ve already owned them.

The Unexpected Power of Vulnerability

But it goes deeper than just neutralizing criticism. Authenticity creates this weird kind of intimacy—even with your so-called enemies.

When you’re real with people, when you admit your faults, share your vulnerabilities, and show your humanity, it’s hard for them to stay in attack mode. They might not agree with you, but it’s much harder to hate someone who isn’t hiding behind a wall.

Now, don’t get me wrong—authenticity isn’t a get-out-of-jail-free card. It doesn’t mean you’re always right, or that people won’t still try to tear you down. But it does mean that you’re not wasting energy maintaining a persona. You’re not wasting time playing defense against attacks on someone you’re pretending to be.

Authenticity Is a Mirror

And here’s a kicker, sort of like a bonus: when you live authentically, you become a mirror.

People see your honesty, and it forces them to confront their own. Some will step up and match it. Others will squirm. Either way, it changes the dynamic. The conversation shifts from posturing to something real. And real conversations? That’s where the magic happens.

Tired of the BS

I think we’re all tired of the bullshit. Tired of the perfect LinkedIn profiles, the curated Instagram lives, the endless parade of people pretending they have it all together.

The truth is, nobody does. We’re all struggling, screwing up, and figuring it out as we go. When you own that, when you put it out there for everyone to see, it’s liberating. For you and for them.

The Strategy of Being Real

So yeah, authenticity isn’t just a personal choice for me—it’s a strategy. It’s my way of saying:

“Here I am. Take it or leave it.”

And funny enough, the more I lean into that, the more people seem to take it. The more conversations I have that actually matter. The more attacks that dissolve before they can even land.

In the End

Being real isn’t just about disarming your critics. It’s about freeing yourself.

When you show up as you are, you take control of the narrative. You say:

“This is me, flaws and all.”

And when you own that, nobody else can.

Let them come. You’ve got nothing to hide.

Keep it real,

-Evan